The perfect day

[Joel]

THE PERFECT DAY FOR HER

8.15 Wake up to hugs and kisses.

8.30 Weigh in 2lb lighter than yesterday.

8.45 Breakfast in bed, freshly squeezed orange juice and croissants, open presents - expensive jewellery chosen by thoughtful partner.

9.15 Soothing hot bath with frangipani bath oil.

10.00 Light work out at club with handsome funny personal trainer.

10.30 Facial, manicure, shampoo, condition, blow dry.

12.00 Lunch with best friend a fashionable outdoor cafe.

12.45 Catch sight of husband/boyfriend's ex and notice she's gained 30lbs.

1.00 Shopping with friends, unlimited credit.

3.00 Nap.

4.00 Three dozen roses delivered by florist, card is from secret admirer.

4.15 Light work out at club, followed by massage from strong but gentle hunk who says he rarely gets to work on such a perfect body.

5.30 Choose outfit from expensive designer wardrobe, parade before full-length mirror.

7.30 Candlelit dinner for two followed by dancing, with compliments received from other diners/dancers.

10.00 Hot shower (alone).

10.50 Carried to bed.......... (freshly ironed, crisp, new, white linen).

11.00 Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling.

11.15 Fall asleep in his big strong arms.

THE PERFECT DAY FOR HIM

6.00 Alarm.

6.15 Blow job.

6.30 Massive satisfying dump while reading the sport section.

7.00 Breakfast: bacon and eggs, coffee and toast, all cooked by naked buxom wench who bends over a lot showing her growler.

7.30 Limo arrives.

7.45 Flight in personal Lear Jet.

9.15 Limo to Mirage Resort Golf Club (blow job en-route).

9.45 Play front nine - 2 under.

11.45 Lunch - pie, chips and gravy, 3 lagers and a bottle of Dom Perignon.

12.15 Blow job.

12.30 Play back nine (of golf course) - 4 under.

2.15 Limo back to the airport (Several Bourbons).

2.30 Fly to Cairns.

3.30 Late afternoon fishing excursion with all female crew, all nude who also bend over a lot displaying growlers.

4.30 Land world record Marlin (1234lbs) - on light tackle.

5.00 Fly home, massage and hand job by naked Elle McPherson (bending over...... naturally).

6.45 Shit, Shower and Shave.

7.00 Watch news: Michael Jackson assassinated; marijuana and hard porn legalised.

7.30 Dinner: lobster appetiser, Dom Perignon (1953) big juicy fillet steak followed by ice-cream served on a big pair of tits.

9.00 Sex with three women (all with lesbian tendencies..... some bending over).

11.00 Massage and Jacuzzi with tasty pizza snacks and a cleansing ale & blowjob.

11.45 In bed alone.

11.50 A 12 second fart which changes note 4 times and forces the dog to leave the room.

12.00 Spend 10mins laughing before falling asleep.

[mhn3773]

lol

[SilverandColdS4]

thats not my perfect day...

[robruf]

Sounds like the day that I just had today, except it was Tera Patrick giving me the 1st blowjob, Aria Giovanni the 2nd blowjob, and Nicole Sheridan giving me the third blowjob, follwed by me doing them all at the same time, then they all woke me up at 3;30am and let me have anal sex with all of them at the same time, bent over showing their growlers.

[DeMoN]

damn SilverandColdS4, that is a huge sig huh?

[supraturbo63]

lol pretty funny

[GT-R_R34]

Originally Posted by Joel THE PERFECT DAY FOR HER 11.50 A 12 second fart which changes note 4 times and forces the dog to leave the room.

LMAO so true.

[possessed_beaver]

Joel, i can tell you are from australia, hahaha by thoes pies and chips for lunch, very funny indeed.
doesent mention the 9 hole golf corse with a corse par of 200, hahah